Abrasions and redness disappear within 24 hours of the event."įor young children, like Milligan, who eventually called an older married sister to intervene, getting help is difficult. "Most prepubescent boys and girls don't have any lasting physical findings. "Most kids have normal exams, and most parents give a credible history," she said. Carole Jenny, a pediatrician and director of the Child Protection Program at Hasbrow Children's Hospital in Providence, R.I., said sexual abuse by mothers is "really hard to diagnose - most of the time it's not witnessed." The family was on welfare, but when social service workers paid their visits, the children were "always pushed out of the house and not allowed to come home," Milligan said.ĭr. "In their defense, I was kept out of school," he said about his frequent injuries. His father was equally volatile, returning once to beat his mother "so bad he left her with an eye hanging out of the socket." His mother also threatened to kill herself and Milligan said he more than once was hit by cars while chasing his mother into the street. The clear sense was that if I did, the punishment would be worse."
"My brother and sister could leave the house and naturally play with friends," he said.
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One victim, Dominic Carter, a TV news reporter in New York, wrote about his own abuse at the hands of his mother in his 2007 memoir, " No Momma's Boy." Earlier this month, Carter was convicted of attempted assault after a 2008 fight with his wife, and could face up to three months in jail.Īs a child, Milligan turned his anguish inward. "And at the legal stage, they get lighter sentences."īecause incest is considered taboo, few boys come forward and social service providers are not often trained in detecting signs in women abusers. "It's easy for women to go unnoticed," said Wilson. They also have easier access to children. Mothers who sexually abuse tend to have higher rates of mental illness and are often the victims of abuse themselves. In September, when child star MacKenzie Phillips went on the "Oprah Winfrey Show" to disclose her father had raped her at the age of 19, calls to RAINN's hotline from incest victims "spiked." "This crime is hard to track because people just don't share it with law enforcement," she told. Today, Milligan is a spokesman for the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network, sharing his experiences as a survivor.Ībout 10 percent of all crisis calls to the RAINN hotline are from males, according to program director Jennifer Wilson, who said they get about 100,000 calls a year. Though his childhood was ravaged, he has managed to raise a son, now 23, who "has never known violence or abuse." He was finally able to tell all in the self-published memoir he took a decade to write - initially titled "God Must Be Sleeping," he changed the title to reflect a more upbeat chronicle of his survival, " A Beautiful World."īut Milligan has much to be positive about. In 27 percent of these cases, the abuse is perpetrated by the child's parents. "For three months I suffered from hysterical paralysis."Īn estimated one in four girls and one in seven boys will be sexually assaulted or abused before the age of 18, according to the Alabama-based National Children's Advocacy Center.
"Around 10 years old, I started to get this unbelievable feeling of dread that if I don't get out I am going to die from the decadence, the debauchery, the forced molestations and the beatings that became more severe," he said. Often, they prey on daughters, but more frequently their sons - who report increased feelings of isolation and sexual confusion along with thoughts of suicide.īoth of Milligan's parents are now dead, but his past still haunts him. One of the unspeakable secrets in the world of child sexual abuse is that mothers can be molesters. It was so horrendous for me to believe she actually would do this to me." "Back then I would never tell anyone, not even a sibling," said Milligan, the most "compliant and sensitive" of three children living at home.
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